Bat Wing Ch 1

The reason Donna Moss hated college was because no one understood. They didn"t even realize where they were living. They didn"t care that Ford"s Theatre was practically in their back yard; that you could buy cranberry muffins and cappuccino from Cosi Sandwich Bar right across from the Kenwick Gallery, and the sweetest sourest Cajun Chicken and plantains and green beans at the International Food Court in Union Station; that the squirrels were so tame they ate out of your hand; that Air Force One took off and landed right there, and that sometimes nasty ladies wearing berets would speed down the roads, talking on their cell phones, threatening to kill with their shoe anyone who crossed their path, and not too far down the road was Roslyn, with its Newseum and Freedom Park There was no one who cared. Until Josh.

Josh was the sexiest guy in Washington. Wherever he went he was followed by hordes of adoring girls declaring their undying devotion. Josh was tall and very flexible (which sent all of the haremites into gutter thoughts). He had curly brown hair, big brown almond-eyes and the most adorable dimples. Sometimes he wore a long trenchcoat which looked quite handsome on him in the rain (especially when he did his "poker face"). Sometimes he wore jeans and navy blue sweaters, or Gorton"s fishmerman clothes with a white tanktop. Many people wanted to ask him why he would wear such a getup, but this was almost impossible. Because anyone who got near Josh would THUD to the floor.

Except Donna.

She was working in his office one day for no apparent reason (Later Josh found out that Donna did a lot of things for no apparent reason). Under the long sensuous blonde hair, the crystal blue eyes, the dazzling smile, and sensitive alabaster skin, she was really almost beautiful.

"Who are you?" Josh said. Donna was wearing a smart Donna-ish outfit, complete with underwear falling out of the pants.

"I"m Donna Moss? I"m your new assistant?"

Finally Josh gave her a nametag with a loving look.

Donna smiled.

Donna and Josh went to shows at The Kennedy Center, and waltzed around pools at ritzy Hollywood fundraisers. They shared beer or french fries and told each other how annoying they were.

In the daytime they worked in The White House, had potato salad and coffee, or went to the beach. Josh taught Donna how to play pool. It was her lifelong dream to play pool—along with playing the flute in front of a stadium of adoring fans while wearing gorgeous pajamas. Josh and Donna got tan (well, Donna didn"t get tan, because she had alabaster skin and she used extra sunblock) and ate veggie-pepperoni-anchovi-pineapple pizza and slept in the office.

"Let"s put you on a stamp," Josh said flirtatiously, because he would flirt with anything.

One night Josh and Donna were cruising around Washington, avoiding pieces of banana hurled at them by rooftop snipers.

Suddenly a piece of banana hit Josh right in the head. "Ow!" he said, "I think you should test my office every morning."

"We"re not in your office," Donna reminded him.

"Whatever . . . . I have something I have to tell you"

"Okay, what is it?"

"I have to wait till we get to the White House"

At the White House, Josh and Donna bought sandwiches and two cokes. They watched interns pushing carts of reports, press secretaries striding importantly down the halls, and Batman and Robin arguing over a speech.

"What did you want to tell me?" Donna asked Josh.

"When I was four, I wanted to be a ballerina."

"Who, what, when, where, how-well not how," Donna said, "It doesn"t matter one bit, you crazy man," she said, giving him a hug.

"But you know I'll always love you the best and think you are a beautiful sexy girl," said Josh, taking a swig of his beer.

"Now we can go shoe shopping together," said Donna, taking his hand.