The song "It Was" is the property of Chelly Wright
and her record label.
The song "Beautiful Goodbye" is the property of
Amanda Marshall and her record label.
The song "In Too Deep" is the property of Genesis and
their record label.
The song "Anymore is the property of Travis Tritt and
his record label.
The song "Does That Blue Moon Ever Shine On You" is
the property of Toby Keith and his record label.
The song "Trying to Get Over You" is the property of
Vince Gill and his record label.
The song "Still Holdin On" is the property of Clint
Black, Martina McBride and their respective record
labels.
The song "Hands to Heaven" is the property of Breathe
and their record label.
I would like to thank AJ for suggesting many of these
songs. By the way guess the entire song is only used
on one of these. Most of this is just little parts of
each song.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Josh came in at 5:30 that morning he noticed that
the light in CJ’s office was on. He walked in and
found her typing furiously into her computer.
“Good morning, you’re here early.”
“Yeah.”
“You okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Listen if you need to talk. I know what Leo did.
Which was probably partially my fault. I’m can’t tell
you how sorry I am for that.”
CJ turned to look at Josh for the first time since he
had walked into the room. “Thanks,” she said, “but I
really *don’t* want to talk about it right now.”
“Okay, listen if you find that you want to talk. I’m
here okay.”
“Yeah, thanks Josh.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Sam walked into Toby’s office later that morning
he found Toby staring out the window.
“Hey.”
Toby turned away from the window. “What the hell do
you want, Sam?”
“Whoa, sorry I guess someone got up on the wrong side
of the bed this morning.”
“Again, Sam what the HELL do you want?!”
“We’ve got staff in five minutes. Listen I’m sorry
about what Leo heard the other day. I heard he came
down pretty hard on you and CJ.”
“What exactly did you hear.”
“Just that Leo came down hard on you two.”
“Okay.”
“Toby, I really am sorry that Leo heard us talking.”
Toby looked at Sam for a moment before answering.
“Don’t worry about it.” He then walked down the hall
to what he knew would be a torturous staff meeting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CJ felt a weird sense of deja vu as she was sitting
in her car stuck in rush hour traffic. Every song she
heard on the radio only made the pain she was feeling
from what happened between her and Toby even worse.
She had gone through this last year when Danny had
left, only for some reason it was even worse now.
Probably because although she found it difficult to
admit to herself, she was very much in love with Toby.
In the weeks since their enforced estrangement they
had barely spoken to each other. She missed being
able to talk to him. As she thought this the chorus
of a song on the radio caught her attention.
It was real...it was magic
It was calm...it was savage
It was cool as a breeze
It was warm to the touch
It was never enough
It was always too much
It did all the things love does
That's how I knew
It was
Okay she thought, that’s just a little bit too sad
for me today. She changed the radio dial.
It really doesn’t matter how time goes by
Cause I still remember you and I
And that beautiful goodbye
And that’s not any better she thought. She tried
another station.
Listen, you know I love you
But I just can’t take this
You know I love you
But I’m playing for keeps
Although I need you
I’m not gonna make this
You know I want to
But I’m in too deep.
Okay one more station she thought. Great the one song
I *really* don’t want to hear. Although she knew the
song would make her cry, she couldn’t change the
station.
My heart can’t take take the beating
Not having you to hold
A small voice keeps repeating
Deep inside my soul
It says I can’t keep pretending
I don’t love you anymore....
My tears no longer waiting
Oh my resistance ain’t that strong
But my mind keeps recreating
A love with you alone
And I’m tired of pretending
I don’t love you anymore
Okay she thought through her tears I really need to
change the station. She changed it too a hard rock
station, and listened to it until she got home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Does that blue moon ever shine on you
I want to hold you close to me
Feel just like it used to be
And baby if you feel like I do
You can come to me
Does that blue moon ever shine on you
Toby knew that the lyrics of the song were true as he
listened to it, and loaded the dishes into the
dishwasher. He had been in a very foul mood when he
got home. He had decided that he didn’t really want
to improve the mood, so he loaded the CD player with
depressing music.
And I’ve been trying to get over you
I’ve been spending time alone
And I’ve been trying to get over you
But it’ll take dying to get it done
Then the next song started to play, and he thought
back to the day that Leo issued his ultimatum.
We can’t deny that this one’s
Out of our control
Stronger than the both of us
And bound to take its toll
I can stand the test of time
And as far as I can see
There are no walls that we can’t climb
Standin’ between you and me
But I’ll go on with my life
We can even say goodbye for now if
If that’s what we have to do
But here in my heart
When my arms are empty darlin’
I’m still holdin’ on to you
There were times when he woke up at night, and just
for a moment he felt CJ was still there. He knew that
he had programmed the songs into the player in reverse
order. It went from bad to worse, and the worst was
still to come.
As I watch you move across the moonlit room
There’s so much tenderness in your loving
Tomorrow I must leave
The dawn knows no reprieve
God give me strength when I am leaving...
So raise your hands to heaven and pray
That we’ll be back together someday
Tonight I need your sweet caress
Hold me in the darkness
Tonight you calm my restlessness
You relieve my sadness
As we move to embrace
Tears run down your face
I whisper words of love, so softly
I can’t believe this pain
It’s driving me insane
Without your touch life will be lonely
So raise your hands to heaven and pray
That we’ll be back together someday
Tonight I need your sweet caress
Hold me in the darkness
Tonight you calm my restlessness
You relieve my sadness
Morning has come another day
I must pack my bags and say goodbye...
The song that always reminded him of the night he and
CJ had spent together. Why he played it he didn’t
know. Maybe he liked the torture of the memories.
But he didn’t need the song to remind him. Although,
he had told her that night that he would not give Leo,
or anyone else the satisfaction of resigning. He
wondered if that was the right decision.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Good morning, sir.” Leo said to the President as he
walked into the Oval Office.
“Good morning. How long do you have until the staff
meeting?”
“About half an hour. Why?”
“Good there’s something I want to talk to you about.”
“What?”
“Well, I’ve heard some rumors about something that
happened a few weeks ago. On the Florida trip to be
exact.”
“Mr. President...”
“Okay, what I heard, and by the way I can’t believe
you would do this. Apparently, two of the staff, the
Communications Director and Press Secretary to be
precise, were having a personal relationship. Is that
much true?”
“Yes, they were.”
“Well, I guess the fact that it is over would explain
the moods the that CJ and Toby have been in lately.
So I guess that the part I heard about you issuing an
ultimatum to them was true, also?”
“I wouldn’t call it an ultimatum, sir.”
“Really, I would. Why the hell would you think you
could meddle in the staff’s personal lives. And
another thing this is twice that you’ve done this to
CJ. You did the same thing when the video of her and
Danny Concannon aired on Hard Copy last year.”
“When the personal lives could cost us politically,
you can damn well believe I’m going to meddle. And
for the other thing that was a legitmate concern,
Concannon is a reporter. CJ is the White House Press
Secretary there is a legitmate concern about her
dating a reporter.”
“Okay, I’ll admit that there was a concern about her
and Danny. But I have one question for you concerning
Toby and CJ. Are you even *listening* to yourself?!”
“What the hell does that mean?!”
“The end of your own marriage has taught you nothing
has it. Happiness is hard to find. Why begrudge it to
those that find it.”
“Sir...” As Leo was speaking the phone on the
President’s desk rang.
“Yes, Mrs. Landingham. I see. When did it happen.
Which one. Okay. Thank you I’ll take care of it
myself. Could you please find out from Carol if CJ is
in yet. Thank you Mrs. Landingham.”
“What’s going on, sir?” Leo asked.
“Toby was in a car accident. I don’t know how
serious yet. If you don’t let CJ handle this anyway
she wants to, then you and I are going to have words
my friend. I’m going to go tell her now. If she
wants to go to the hospital, I’m going to ask Josh to
drive her.”
“Yes, sir.
to be continued...